Put The Fork Down!!

Nationwide, two-thirds of U.S. adults are obese or overweight, according to the fourth annual report from the Trust for America’s Health. Mississippi, where almost one in three adults are obese, also ranks highest in adult hypertension and physical inactivity.

This came from cnn.com. Now I will agree that America is getting fatter by the day, but I don’t agree with calling it an epidemic. Americans are fat because we’re lazy, there’s more accessability to fatty food, and Americans have tons (no pun intended) of lame excuses: “This is just my body, I’m just built this way…”, “I have an underactive thyroid…”, “My whole family is fat, therefore, I’m fat…”, or my favorite: “I’m big – boned…” Oh come on… Rhinos are big – boned, you’re just big. Put the fork down!

Also, in the last 25 years or so, Americans have never really had a problem with being lazy. We think we’re being efficient, but there’s a fine line between efficiency and laziness. We love our 300+ channels On Demand, our maids to clean our own houses, we buy our TV dinners and our “fat burning” pills in very large quantities. This is a problem. Americans want a pill for everything, no work involved. Soccer moms think it’s easier to stop at Burger King so little Johnny can eat, yet she wonders why little Johnny is developing love handles and why she has to shop in the husky department.

We Americans think we work hard and should relax at the end of the day instead of doing something productive. What the hell? We’re rich enough, we’re a world power, time to sit back and relax. Well, does that mean that the rest of the world doesn’t work hard enough? Most of Western Europe has just about the same economy as America. They work just as hard, maybe harder, and they don’t have an “Obesity Epidemic.” Just because we work hard doesn’t mean that we should relax at the end of the day and do nothing.

Last, but not least, fat Americans are the result of rising healthcare costs. Every year healthcare goes up, and it’s not for the people that are in shape, but it’s the people that are in shape that have to pay for it. A Medicare study found that obese patients cost the agency 15 percent more than normal or overweight patients. I wonder who’s pocket that comes out of?

The bottom line is that obesity in NOT an epidemic, laziness is. Stop treating obesity like the Ebola virus and get to the root of the problem: Americans are LAZY! Americans have a laziness epidemic. We have no motivation anymore. America’s gone soft (once again, no pun intended). How many times have you heard an obese person say that he joined a gym, only to say in two days that it hurts too much and it’s not for him? How many people in Wal – Mart, who are perfectly capable of walking, have you seen riding those damn scooters that take up the whole aisle and go a half a mile per hour? How many people complain about rising healthcare? Americans need to stop whining and looking for the easy way out, get off their obese behinds and be productive again.

Keith’s High Cholesterol

This is Keith. Keith has high cholesterol. He likes to eat anything breaded, battered, buttered, basted, baked, creamy, smothered, savory, dipped, rich and fried. He also thinks that fudge and Oreo cookies are a suitable after – meal dessert. Everybody at Keith’s job is worried about him, the only thing is, he’s not really worried too much about himself. They try to steal all of his goodies and he just locks the door to his office so nobody can get to his stash.

Here’s how Keith ranks with his cholesterol numbers. The numbers on the left represent when he was 26, the numbers on the right are present day, at age 33:

HDL: 32 63

LDL: 180 199

Overall: 295 288

Pretty bad, huh….What can Keith do to lower his cholesterol so he doesn’t die of a stroke or a massive heart attack at age 42? Let’s start with diet.

What Keith pretty much likes to eat, and what he should seriously limit is whole milk, cream, ice cream, butter, egg yokes, cheese, bakery goods made with yokes and saturated fat, anything with saturated oils, high – fat processed meats (sausage, bologna, hot dogs…), fatty red meats, solid fats like shortening, soft margerine and lard and fried foods. All of these things are very high in cholesterol as well as fat.

What Keith should be eating is a diet rich in fruits and vegetables, whole grains, high – fiber foods, lean meats and poultry, fish at least twice a week, fat – free or 1% milk and dairy products, beans, peas, nuts and seeds (in limited amounts) and unsaturated vegetable oils.

Overall, the AHA recommends that your total daily intake should look like this:

total fat: 25 – 35%

saturated fat: less than 7%

trans fat: less than 1%

Keith should also start an exercise regimen. He says he runs now. Running is good, but running by itself won’t lower cholesterol. Besides, with the way it looks, Keith intakes more calories than he burns by running. He should step up the running along with a strength training program to build muscle. Remember that muscle burns fat. The more muscle you have, the more fat you burn. The way to increase muscle is by strength training. Strength training will help you burn the fat away and also help you keep it off.

Let’s hope that Keith gets his act together. Everybody at work is worried about you and wants you to live a long happy life. Good luck, Keith!

Britney’s Big Comeback?

Well well well….The former lean, mean dancing machine known to the world as Britney Spears seems to dodging the gym these days. Nevermind all of the tabloid stories and her personal life, the bottom line is that Britney looks like hell. One look at this picture and all of those who want to spear Britney will have a field day. Poor Britney….life is so hard for her anymore…

Now that Britney is trying so hard to make a comeback, the first thing she needs to do is get back in shape – Lose the gut, the lovehandles, and the sagging underarms, and get those rock – hard abs back that she’s known for. This can’t be that hard for her, as Ms. Spears has tons of money, so hiring a personal trainer and buying a good treadmill shouldn’t be a problem (maybe you can find one at LifeSpan Fitness). All she needs is the motivation, something that all of her “Yes” people are stealing from her. If they keep doing that, they’ll be looking for a new celebrity to bring down.

Britney, every teenage boy needs you right now. Please, get back to the Britney we knew four years ago, before the botched marriages, two kids, rehab, drugs, late night parties and public meltdowns. And for the love of God, memorize your words before you try to lip – sync them onstage in front of millions of people…I mean c’mon, right now K – Fed has a more vibrant career than you do. Get it together!